Exposed

...Wow... I don't know where to begin... I am not sure what I want to write down and remember so well. But this has been one of my life changing 2 weeks... It has not been very easy, but I think something great has come out of it. The Lord is definitely working on me, through this experience I was able to see what I was struggling with and did not even know it! Of course in the comfort of Ashton Parc, Sacramento, surrounded by family and friends, steady income coming in, etc... I thought I knew what I meant when I said, "I trust the Lord, He has it all under control, by His grace...." now I am able to live it and it does not seem that it will become any easier very soon (it might); however, I know that my Creator has given my husband and me an opportunity. Although there isn't a very clear picture in front of us on how we are going to do this... I trust that God will provide when it is the right time.

Last Sunday's church service was a sobering one for me. The word was encouraging and convicting as Vincent continued preaching through the first chapter of Romans; and singing hyms in church was such a great time of repentance for me because the words of complete dependance and trust on God, were flowing from my heart, sometimes it was difficult to sing along because as the melody went on I felt exposed, exposed of my weakness and sin. After church, Vlad also helped me as he talked me through what I was feeling and believing and we got to the bottom of it... we are going! I support Vlad in his studies, I believe in what we are doing, and right now there isn't anything else I would rather work so hard on.

On another note:
I was able to let my manager know what is going on and he completely understood and blessed me. He is being very supportive and appreciated that I let him know ahead of time by including him in my situation. I am seeking employment and he let me know that I can use his name and phone number as my reference! Great! I can answer YES to "may we contact your current employer". So for now, Vlad gets to go down to Los Angeles every Monday and come back to Sacramento Thursday nights for the next couple of weeks until I obtain employment. Praying for wisdom on exactly how I should transition to my Burbank home. Hopefully, I could schedule interviews for Fridays and drive down to our Burbank home some weekends too; that way we can sort of alternate weekends on driving up and down. Interstate 5 has become our normal route and feels rather "homey".

For Now:
I get to continue working at my current job as a credit analyst and enjoy living in three different homes, Vlad's parents, my parents, and Burbank. I am able to spend quality time with my family and friends while I am still here, and when I go down to Burbank I get to spend quality time interviewing, hopefully! Keeping my ears and heart open for counsel I get from my loving family and friends, it is encouraging. Most importanly, I am dwelling in the bible, constantly being reminded that if this life is lived without glorifying God and living for Him, it is a waste; to obtain things on earth and enjoy when everthing clicks together will never ever ever ever compare to when it clicks in the Kingdom, whether when Jesus returns or I am called home.